Resolution #1 Loving More

Earlier in the week, I spoke of resolutions and left you with the following thoughts:

My list for 2006 is short. Love more, be healthier, forgive generously, exercise patience and last but most importantly building a legacy of kindness. I wish all these things and more for you. More on the legacy idea in another post!

When I started to write about the goals, I realized that each one was a subject of importance on it’s on, so I’m going to break this into 5 posts.

Resolution #1 – Loving More

Sometimes my heart is so full that I wonder whether it’s possible to love more. It hasn’t always been that way. There have been times when rejection, depression, circumstances and attitude have robbed me of the capability to love, which in my view is an act of giving coupled with an ability to accept the love that is given to you without redefining what it should be. I have found that an empty heart craves the company of no one, cherishes little and has a short memory for the charity and good will of others.

It is impossible to love unless you fill your heart with the things in life that endure. God, family, friends, community and nature are paramount among these. Even though all of us have a time in life when work dictates most of our waking hours; even that must be tempered with the things you hold dear. Otherwise, what purpose does the work fulfill except for existence? What a sad thing it is when existence is the only purpose of productivity.

If you want to work with joy, think about the purposefulness of what you are doing…supporting your family, filling a need for your employer, or the broader aspect of what is accomplished or built by the work you are engaged in. Never despair, always persist, change when you must, but always carry your love with you through all that you do. It will sustain you in the worst of times and encourage you to do your very best always.

I pledged to love more this year with all of these things on my mind. I also made that promise to myself knowing that at this time in my life, this is the easiest goal to meet. I am surrounded by love from my family…my husband, four children and six grandchildren and two more (twins) on the way this year, extended family who are involved in my life now that we have retired to Texas, friends from church and from my neighborhood and the many cherished relationships of both my husband’s life and mine that come from the past and endure through the present.

The birth of the twins, without any added effort, will make my promise come true for this year. I already love them and I’m ready for them to come into my life and share experiences with me. I have not been as close as I would like to my other grandchildren, who are almost grown, because of distance and circumstance and I very much want this to work out differently. Being a positive presence in their little lives will give me a lot of joy.

There is more though. I want to carry the responsibility of my love. Feeling love and declaring it are the easy parts. Committing yourself to daily, purposeful action that validates and strengthens the bonds of love is more at the heart of the matter. Being a real Christian according to Christ’s calling requires more than the act of baptism, it requires that you give daily consideration to your actions and to the needs of others and that you attend to them. Love is the same.

In closing, I just want to say that relationships are fragile and people are vulnerable. Our time is limited and precious and we can’t be sure that everyone we love will be here when it’s convenient to show our love. If love feels like a risk to you, my advice is to take the risk. Write the letters you meant to write, make the calls that keep you connected, archive your memories for future generations and most importantly, wear your love where it can be seen and felt. Nothing is ever lost by giving love away and everything is gained.

I wish you all the love your heart and mind can hold in this New Year and forever.

Paula

As a bonus…here is my favorite perspective on love.

1 Corinthians 13

If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.

If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.

If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.

It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.

It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears.

When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me.

Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.